Tuesday, September 17, 2013

My World, my Thoughts, my Bad!

I appreciate that you're all going to groan inwardly at my latest statement and say: 'Karl's got too much time on his hands again!', but this latest glitch in my life has me genuinely puzzled, and here it is, are you ready?

How come my socks spin around my feet when I'm walking?

Today I went for a short walk. When I left the house my socks were on correctly--- as per the instructions on the packet---but when I got back home again and took my shoes off, the heel of the sock was now on the top of my foot, and I never felt it move.

Could someone please explain this conundrum to me so I can learn to better understand my socks and have more walks filled with the beauty of my surroundings and not, as is the present state, spend them wondering what the hell is going on in my shoes!


Looks like my blog is being viewed by more people than I actually know. I've just been contacted by an art gallery who want to display some of my work. It's an honest to god gallery; I checked it out and it looks impressive.

'Very nice', I hear you say, and I would agree with you all accept for the fact that this particular gallery deals exclusively with artists who have mental health issues...

I wonder where they got that idea from?


Today I managed to bite that thin strand of skin that connects the tongue to the bottom of my mouth; and it stings like a bitch! 

But really, how the hell is that even possible?

I've had a good look around my mouth with a dentists' mirror and a miners' lamp, and the best I can work out is it would require me to have teeth that could pivot backwards at a 45° angle and snip gaily away with industrial wire cutters.

So my best guess is either my teeth have turned into a semi intelligent life form--- independent of me and are launching guerrilla style attacks on the rest of my mouth--- or my dentist isn't telling me everything when we have our check ups...although it would explain his unexpected outburst last time I visited him when he said:
"Aclusal amalgam,  next one missing, three two one fine, al...oh my dear sweet lord, did you just see that...? ahem, sorry...everything else is fine, please take your notes to the receptionist and never come back..."

Does this mean that my mouth is also out to get me?! 

I hope they don't sign a pact with the spiders.



  1. Hi Karl! I can sense some paranoia creeping in here... As long as your socks and teeth stay roughly where they should be you'll be fine. It's when they swap places you REALLY have to worry! Kind regards, Brian 'the sausages are out to get me' Griffiths.

    1. Me paranoid? Who's been talking?
      I have an odd and worrying life; I now have peppermint loving spiders and an ecclesiastical, re-occurring dream; but more about that soon.

      Perhaps you'd like to write a guest post about your sausage paranoia, Brian

      Best wishes



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