First off, and before we launch into the odd realm that is my mind, let us take a moment  to reflect upon the glory of our new post heading, which I have produced at no extra cost to you and purely for your enjoyment and viewing pleasure.

I have written a few of these 'Diary' style posts in the past, but up until now you've had to make do with a black and white image of myself looking wistful and forlornly into the distance as someone drives off in my car. But as of now, this highly literary (ahem) section of our little blog, and oasis to insanity, will have it's own identifiable header.

All hail the cartoonist...(takes a bow to thunderous applause)

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Howdy Doodie Comrade

America has always been my biggest audience by far, followed by the UK India, China and Europe. But as of today I am being hit very heavily by Russia.
So I would just Like to take this opportunity to reach out to all those oil rich Oligarchs out there and send them this simple, heartfelt message from the bottom of my heart. And this is it:
I am a cartoon tart for financial backing and if you like what you see and would like to fund me I am all yours. PS, I love your brightly coloured buildings, tall hairy hats and cheap bridal sites.

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Milking it

A few days ago I noticed on the side of a carton of Soya milk a byline which read 'For the Professional'. This, I'm sorry to say confused me. Not that it's that difficult to confuse me, but confused I was. And when I'm confused I tend to write letters to people in charge, which usually brings a level of confusion to their day that they probably didn't deserve.
The letter below is what I have just dispatched to Apro, the makers of the Soya Milk in question.

Dear Sir/Madam (I am no sexist or misogynist), 

I recently purchased a carton of your excellent Soya Milk (see empty carton enclosed for proof. Please also excuse the teeth marks and chisel chips on the cap, I had the devil's own job breaking in). 

Where as I did indeed enjoy the superb flavour and quality of your product I was somewhat troubled by your byline which read: 'For the Professional'. This got me to thinking about what kind of professional you were targeting. Is it for professional footballers or accountants? Maybe you aimed your professional soya at the doctors of this world or are you gearing up for a big push toward solicitors and other members of the misery and ambulance chasing community? 

Having thought that far, I decided to think some more, the result of which is as follows: I myself am a professional cartoonist and would love to think that we would soon be having our very own soya. If this was indeed the case---and please tell me that it is---I would happily shout these glad tidings from the roof tops and in all the cartoonist forums (those dark corners of the net where we congregate in nervous numbers---we don't like the light you see), where I will tell all fellow professionals that our time has come and at last the soya milk industry has recognised us. And to celebrate our oddities and foibles they have given us our very own soya based beverage. 

If this isn't the case and you are aiming your soya at the general population of professionals then my daughter---who is not a professional---says she feels like she has been enjoying your product under false pretences and could you please send her some samples of your unprofessional soya milk instead. 

I look forward to your reply. 

Yours Sincerely (and without prejudice)

Karl Dixon 

(CEO of the Hug-a-Cartoonist Society)

So far no reply. But I will, of course, keep you informed.

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Sketchbook Corner

And now, here's some shots from my sketchbook, for no other reason than to prove that I have one. So until next time, au revoir mes amis, toodle pip old chap, s'long buddy and to my new found Russian friends Прощайте друзья. (if I've just inadvertently insulted your mother's cat please forgive me and blame Google Translate).

Roughs for a new Pixy Wood tale

OOOOO, top secret. I will tell you soon...around June when I hope to start it off.

And some more ooooo top secret stuff...see you in June about this one.

A rough for a new Big Ol' Bear picture and card and maybe even a calendar

Please come back on Wednesday 30th March when my next post will be showing you how I produced a pencil sketch study of a horse. It'll be fun, it always is.


I sincerely hope you enjoyed this post. If you did then please share it like a demented sharing person and keep on coming back for more of the same, and a whole lot besides.

New Work-Dandy Annual 2017

Looks like this year I came back into the comics world with a crash, a bang and one of those stunt-man type rolls.

Not only did I get a very nice order from DC Thomson, creators of many titles including the Dandy comic, but I have been approached by a new prospective publisher (more about that on a separate post). But first let's get onto the Dandy Annual project.

Although I can't show you the whole page---sorry about that---I wanted to share sections and tasty tempters of what will be coming in the Dandy Annual 2017 (out around September 2016)

Some of you may know that I used to have a really great career in British children's comics until just
before the sad demise of the Dandy. (I'm pretty sure it wasn't ALL my fault).

Anyway, the Dandy, although no longer a comic, still comes out as an annual, with all the stars old and new. And this year I have been asked to produce a fair few of the pages for the weighty and welcome tome of merriment and mirth.

Amongst these commissions were three two page Ollie Fliptrik Pages, five Dirty Dick comic strips and an eight page Secret Agent Sally story; all scripts written by my own fair hand and produced by my own odd mind.

Now I could say a lot about the process, and how happy I am to be working for the great DC Thomson again, but you probably just want me to shut the *&%"% up and show you some brightly coloured pictures. Oh well, if that's what you want then who am I to argue with you, especially seeing as I have other 'how to' posts lined up and you can get your fixes then.

But for now, here's some sample cutaways (I'm not really allowed to show the whole page as that would be naughty and unfair and I would probably get shouted at by custard pie wielding lawyers---I honestly believe the comics industry employ such legal people). So here we go...

"It is also worth noting that all work is copyright DC Thomson, and that includes world rights and such stuff. You have been warned; watch out for the custard pie wielding lawyers..."

On another point you will notice that there are no word balloons. Although I did write the scripts, the lettering is still done and Thomson Towers...I have a sneaking suspicion that they have trust issues.

The last panel from a typical Ollie Fliptrik catastrophe.

I love drawing the snow, so when I get to write and draw, snow tends to feature largely.

Dirty Dick was a revived character from the golden age. Dick would go out clean and come back filthy; no matter how hard he tried; it was His thing.

Agent Sally was originally a collaboration between myself and Craig Graham, the Beano editor. But for the annual I got to write it myself. So guess what? More snow.

Now on a final point, I've added a before and after as seldom does an entire commission get away without a few amendments. In this case having seen the finished art, the editors asked me to change the last panel so the snow was removed and a hard rocky surface put in its place. So with the aid of a light box and some Photoshopery-jiggery-pokery I produced a page without having to redraw it all, as would've been the case 20 years BP (Before Photoshop)

I sincerely hope you enjoyed this post. If you did then please share it like a demented sharing person and keep on coming back for more of the same, and a whole lot more.

Planning on getting rid of the spiders

For a while now I've been living my odd little existence on Facelessbook and now I'm moving it to a more natural home, here, my blog which is filled with my oddball tales and thoughts; if nothing else it makes for more posts and insights into my eccentric mind, which I'm not sure is a good or bad thing.

So the little tale below is about the constant battles I have with the spiders in my house.
 
Those regular readers of my Facelessbook witterings will know of my issues with them, of how they rule my fears, pinch my car keys and in one particular case, drink my whiskey, but now I'm here to say the battle has finally gone legal.

Okay, so here's how it happened: out in my back room I have always had spiders webs. I don't mind them out there as they catch a lot of unwanted flies and they don't seem that interested in chasing me around the rest of my property; so as far as you can have a good spider, these are good spiders.

But lately they've been taking liberties.

The little eight legged hairy freaks have started extending their webs, webs that have historically been of a one story structure now have moved into palatial two or tree story web mansions! Some even have car-ports, summer houses and a swimming pool!

I've contacted the council and they've come along to have a look. They've taken copious amounts of notes, had meeting, sub meetings, committee meetings and audit meetings that have gone on into the night. And today I am happy to announce I received their final decision, and this is it:

Whereas they are aware that you don't need planning permission to build a web you do if that web exceeds one whole third of its original structure, and seeing as it has grown, in some cases by over five times, then they (the council) have no option but to order the removal of all illegal sections of the web; to include all out structures, swimming pools, jacuzzi houses saunas and in the case of the seedier parts of my back room; brothels.

I took the order in to show the spiders today with the self satisfied smirk of one who had used the legal system to his advantage. Most of the spiders just scoffed at the legal document while at least three of them took a run at me.

I, naturally, ran off screaming like a big girlie and am now writing this post within the confines on my electric spider fence.

On a further note, I've been asked by someone what kind of spiders they are? I said I wasn't too sure but I had heard the one calling the other Norris if that would help. I've yet to hear back from him

The war continues.

My Diary---week ending 26th June 2013

Once again we delve into my weird Facelessbook Ramblings; I've also added some Twitter twaddle to, and a comic strip at the end...

Enjoy!





June 22
Just been driving through Llyswen, a little village outside Brecon, when I saw a group of pensioners being bundled into the back of a transit van; seriously, I thought, OAP trafficking...surely not?!

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I just came in from hanging the washing out when I heard a faint squeaking sound, coming from somewhere near my feet. I looked, saw nothing and turned to move away when I heard the sound again. I turned and looked more closely. But still I found nothing.
It was only when I heard it a third time that I got more than a little concerned. Was it a little vole or mouse lost and frightened. Had an abandoned baby bird got caught in the undergrowth?
I moved closer with scrutiny etched on my worried features and as I did so I heard the squeaking sound again and it definitely came from around my feet. And as I bent down lower I saw a tiny hole in my trainers and every time I moved it sent a little pocket of wheezing, bubbling air out of my shoe making a little squeaking sound.
That's my Saturday, hows yours been?

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Well its summer time so Sky have put a Little House on the Prairie Christmas special on.
Something worth noting: the kids opened their presents and went whacko over a shiny new penny and a pair of mittens...lets all try that this year and see how far our kids let us get with a happy Christmas.

June 23

Okay, update on the whole 'Little House on the Prairie' thing. A warring Indian has just come into their cabin house with an interpreter. He says he will speak for the chief. The chief says: 
"Horo mon happ"
The interpretor says:
Big Chief Featherinhiscap say: he is proud warrior chief of the grazing lands of great buffalo of ancestors. He say many years he wandered over the snow capped mountains of the forefathers and many a battle he has had with the long knives and yellow beards, and pipe of peace smoked with fork tongues but now it is time to settle, now it is time to join his kin in the reservations, now it is time for peace" And I think he even chucked a 'How' in at the end...
I was just looking open mouthed thinking: if he got all that from; 'Horo mon happ' I can only guess that the Apache translation of Lord of the Rings is like about 16 pages long, and that’s with the 'bit about the author'

June 24

Stumbled out of my bedroom this morning to find my car keys on the landing---they must've fallen out of my pocket on the way to bed last night.
But the weird thing was a spider had attached a strand of web to them and appeared to be trying to drag the keys off.
Now I don't like spiders, and as a rule when I see them I either scream like a girlie or beat them with unholy and disproportionate force, but the sight of one trying to have it away with my car keys is not something you see everyday, so I watched a little longer.
After ten minutes I was still not sure what it was trying to do or even if its intentions were to get to my car, and with the aid of a few more delinquent spiders, go for a joy ride: my estimate would be the'd need at least six. Two to steer, three to operate the pedals and one with a very strong thread to shift the gears.
I watched for another five minutes, got board, used unholy and disproportionate force on him and buggered off down stairs to soak my cornflakes.
I haven't checked the car yet to see if the others were already in place--- and just waiting for the keys--- but now I think of it, they may have got tired of waiting and just hot wired my car. I'm just worried that my car may have been stolen by five spiders and how I'm going to explain that one to the police.

June 26

Just found out I've got Tennis Elbow in Wimbledon fortnight...the irony is not lost on me...Mind you I was also diagnosed with Beer Drinkers' Elbow at the Munich Beer Festival

Random Twitter Twaddle:

'I've got an eye test tomorrow; I just know I'm going to be up all night cramming for it.'

'When relief comes into your life it is transitory, when frustration arrives it brings suitcases and takes over the left wing of your mind'

'Things not to say to a customs official: Is this a gun in my pocket or am I just happy to see you. I still can't walk straight'

'What is food for thought? I'm having a cheese sandwich, but I have to admit I'm not getting any great ideas just yet. Perhaps it needs mayo'

'Further to my last tweet: What is 'food for thought' and does it come with a low fat option?'

'I'm off to bed to see if my dreams are any weirder than the one last night. That involved a black nurse a 4 inch guy and a butter-nut squash'

'Its free comic day today. Apparently no one told Forbidden Planet this and they chased me for three blocks before getting their comic back'

'If love is blind how come you can't get a disability allowance for it?'

If I have another odd week---which lets face it is a distinct possibility---I'll do more of these next week...Oh and I thought I'd throw a random comic strip in just for the hell of it!

I'm so good to you.

If you like my blog and the things that I say and do, please tell your friends; mention me on Facebook, Twitter and any of the other fine social media networking sites you use. I would love to have my work reach a much larger audience and although I could no doubt eventually get there under my own steam, I'll get there a lot quicker with your help, so please, please spread the word.

Thank you

Brabbles & Boggitt Page 27

Next Week: The 3 Bears wake up to the joint horrors of Goldilocks' retribution and the paparazzi and are forced into hiding in their own home

New to Brabbles & Boggitt? click here and start reading from the beginning.

If you like my blog and the things that I say and do, please tell your friends; mention me on Facebook, Twitter and any of the other fine social media networking sites you use. I would love to have my work reach a much larger audience and although I could no doubt eventually get there under my own steam, I'll get there a lot quicker with your help, so please, please spread the word.

Thank you